I am writing this blog as therapy, to organize my thoughts and to calm my nerves. You see, in two days I am giving a talk to a group of entrepreneurs about moving out of your comfort zone. In this talk, I will be sharing my personal experiences of hardship and of facing anxieties in my family life and in business, with the hopes of inspiring others to learn how to deal with FEAR… through the practice of YOGA.
Over the past few months, I have been given these amazing opportunities to share my passion and my story through public speaking… as if I am some type of expert. But, I can tell you right now, that I am so not. I do not have everything under control. The first time I gave a big talk, only 5 months ago… I felt like throwing up. I really did. It was in French, in front of about 150 people, and I was really nervous. But guess what, I did it. I was able to move past my fear. And nothing blew up… the world kept on turning and there was some “magic”… on the other side, with more opportunities since.
Every day, something unexpected happens, something goes wrong. Just like everyone else, I deal with juggling a family, a business and time for me. At home, it could be about one kid beating the other up, or a phone that needs to be confiscated or a project that was forgotten… At the studio, it could be the air conditioning breaking down when its 30 degrees outside, or an instructor that cannot come in last minute or a client that has to speak to me about something important… There is always an issue.
One thing I have noticed over time is that I have grown WISER. Maybe it’s age… I do have a few grey hairs to speak for now… but it’s also experience. Today, I am much less sensitive than I used to be. I had to learn how to not let my emotions run wild. In the past, every little thing would make me nervous, frazzled even… especially as a business owner. Here’s a little story…
It was December, 2013, just before Christmas, two weeks before I was supposed to open the studio. After a major snowstorm came warm weather… all the snow was melting, and a major leak sprung in the roof, in several places. Water was pouring into the studio. There were buckets everywhere, the newly painted walls were bubbling up and my new floors were at risk of water damage. My landlord was not being helpful to say the least and I was so stressed out because I had to postpone the grand opening. I remember just crying in the middle of the studio, right in front of my contractors. Those poor guys had to be contractors and my psychologists at the same time.
I was so afraid to disappoint people… the teachers I hired, and all my clients who have followed me for years who were waiting to come. I was worried I would lose them all. I was worried about what people would think of me. Would they think I was not a good business person because my launch was delayed? There was so much NOISE in my mind… Sebastian, my husband was still working his own corporate job at the time. I had 3 boys and my littlest was only 1 year old. I was crazy enough to open up a studio all on my own and I was about to lose my mind… I allowed this situation to destabilize me. I was floating, not feeling grounded… Doubting myself and the solid base of students I had built up over the last 15 years! BREATHE… think Root Chakra, for grounding, right?
Have you ever had to deal with intimidation? I have. Being a businesswoman is not always easy. I have been in situations where intimidation was definitely used to try to scare me. Sometimes the asian gift of looking young does not always work in your favor. Sometimes looking young makes people think you are inexperienced and that you can be pushed around. It has been a constant theme over the course of my life, especially in the corporate world, where I used to be. I have often had to prove myself to people. It’s not always easy to be a woman. I used to find it really hard to stand up for myself and say what I wanted to say. Not to be shy… to communicate with confidence. BREATHE… think Throat Chakra for the ability to speak with assertion and clarity.
With almost four years of being in business under my belt, I have grown a much thicker skin. I have become more comfortable dealing with change. I have learned to breathe and not let myself get upset so easily. It is what I do on a daily basis. I have built a strong support team around me that helps me to manage my business and allows me to have good balance. I do not do it alone and this allows me to breathe too. I constantly work on building a solid foundation with my people, with ongoing education and mentoring… and this brings us all more skills and confidence. With this base, I am better able to deal with the yogic concept of impermanence.
The way I parent today, with my third child, is so much more relaxed than with my first. When my firstborn would do something dangerous, I would run to his rescue immediately. With the second, well he got away with everything because I was too busy hanging out with my mommy friends and then by the time my third child came along… I would just laugh and take pictures of the dangerous thing he would be doing… It’s amazing how our outlook on life changes. My perspective on life changed… And how did this happen?
In yoga, we talk often about physically taking your body to the edge. Not going to where it hurts, but just slightly out of your comfort zone. Find where it’s a bit uncomfortable, then stay and breathe. Over time, this edge begins to move out, helping us open up more or hold a posture longer or breathe deeper. This is how we grow, in LIFE.
I can only speak from my personal experiences, but here are tips that I have found work best for me.
- Surround yourself with a supportive tribe around you…
Be with people who encourage and mentor you and who are there to support you while you are out of your comfort zone. Like a good yoga teacher… you need this in your everyday life.
In order to separate yourself from the emotions that pass by… Breathe to see things with greater clarity and tackle the things one at a time. Let go of the things you cannot control. Be grateful for what is good.
- Do not be afraid to move past your edge, one breath at a time.
Move to the edge surrounded by your tribe. Become ok with the feeling of being out of your comfort zone, in LIFE, just like yoga on the mat.
- Take your yoga off the mat.
Thanks for your ear and letting me figure out what I will talk about for my speech tomorrow 💕
Rozel Gonzales, is the owner of the Energie EnCorps Wellness centre in the West Island of Montreal. She is a passionate yoga and fitness teacher, speaker and entrepreneur, dedicated to helping people SHINE FROM THE INSIDE OUT. Each day she advocates living in the present moment and taking the philosophy of yoga OFF THE MAT. A mother of 3 young boys, Rozel is proud to be the lead instructor for the 200h Ashtanga Vinyasa Yoga Teacher Training at her centre, continuously developing talented teachers who are passionate about what they do and are able to spread the passion for yoga to other. To sign up for classes, book a massage, osteopathy or nutrition appointment or for more info on our workshops or teacher trainings, please visit our site: www.energieencorps.com HELPING YOU SHINE FROM THE INSIDE OUT!